Sum of the Parts
I've been saving up several possible topics for writing on this blog for a couple days now, figuring that more details or experiences will create enough observation/commentary to do a whole post on one topic. Alas, the number of topics is growing but not in depth. So, I've decided just to write a totally disjointed post that includes all of them before they allude me altogether. The following really don't go together at all. Enjoy the chaos.
*I was furious at Leona's for 30 seconds.
Everyday I walk past Leona's and I always feel slightly annoyed at their proselytizing via their new electronic sign. Every week or so a new, pithy saying goes up that has some inherent moral involved and I always, ALWAYS pick a fight with the person typing that into the sign. Stuff like "It takes more muscles to frown than smile." I don't need to be preached to by a restaurant trying too hard to be TGI Friday's (seriously...that's messed up) by touting how BIG their food is. Not necessarily good, but ya get lots of it. So, when I passed the sign and it said, "Success is in the manly attitude," I snapped. I had had it. Now they've crossed the line. I was planning my march in their to confront anyone at the front desk as I noticed that it actually said, "Success is mainly in the attitude." Whoops. That was close one.
*Does anyone know where I can find a Wii?
I finally decided that the change my life needed was yet another kind of console with yet another kind of virtual community. I don't care...I could play tennis in my living room and don't even get me started on Guitar Hero. But I CAN'T FIND ONE TO BUY!!! The stores are still sold out from the holidays and I can't handle the thought of spending an extra $100 (bringing the total to almost $500) to buy one on eBay or something. I HATE that. But now I'm caught. I really...REALLY...want this thing. Like yesterday. What to do? What to do?
*What is it with dirty sayings on t-shirts?
So I was grinding away on the elliptical today at the gym when I couldn't help but notice how many foul sayings I saw on the backs of t-shirts. Usually most shocking to me are the ones that are prom t-shirts, sponsored by a high school, that say something so sexually suggestive I almost find it offensive. Why do I have to be subjected to that? Running a close second to that are the team t-shirts that are personalized; the girl on the machine in front of me today was wearing a shirt that indicated her name was "Schweaty." I'm thinking 1) not her real name 2) not a good name 3) now I've got too many questions that can never be answered. This was one of the more PG-rated names I've seen screened on the backs of those shirts. In my day of team sports, we put our actual names and not some inside-joke, weirdo nickname back there. It was a matter of pride. Now a perfectly lovely girl will always be known to me as "Schweaty" and it just doesn't seem fair. Running a close third to all of the above are shorts/pants with names/sayings/adjectives (Juicy) running across the ass. I cannot handle being manipulated by someone else's pants; putting words down there necessarily makes me want to read them...and now I'm staring at a 19-year-old gir's ass. Great. The only option I can think of that would be worse would be suggestive sayings below the belt on the front of pants...now that I've said it I'm afraid it'll come true.
*What's going on with the sidewalks and their inability to drain?
The past few days around here have been a walking nightmare. I cross seven streets on my way to and from school making that 14 corners. Normally, not a problem. Yesterday and today, crossing those corners requires a small canoe and or water wings. I've never seen anything like it. Yesterday I had to take to the snow drifts to get back onto the sidewalks with any chance of maintaining a mildly dewy sock and forego the chance to create my own Lake Michigan in each shoe. And it would be one thing if the water was clean--this is disgusting, slushy, salty, gasoline-y road wash that's been churning there in the corner of the streets for days and days. So my question is this--why won't it go away? I'm looking right at the drains in the road and they're clear. I'd say that we probably saw the worst of it yesterday since today I was noticing the puddles noticeably smaller but the upcoming forecast doesn't look good. First it's going to get very cold (freezing all wet surfaces like one continuous sheet of ice) and then it's going to snow 5 inches. When all of that melts (surely sometime next week), it's gonna look like Waterworld around here...and that was an AWFUL movie. I'm not sure I can handle it.
So. Now I've had my say and I can go to bed. In 4 hours...
Comments
Identity with the rest too. Excellent excellent post.